Ten Things I Know About You

Title:  Alter-Eighteen:  Ten Things I Know About You
Author:  Terri
E-mail:  xgrrl26@yahoo.com
Rating:  PG-13
Disclaimer:  I don't own them, but by now, they might own me..
Archive:  WFRA, Peep Hut, Mutual Admiration.  Anyone else, please ask and I'll
say yes.
Feedback:  Please!  Although it will probably just encourage me if it's good.All varieties, good, bad, and ugly welcome.
Summary:  Alternative version of events in the movie and eighteen series.  Logan rescues Rogue and ends up learning a lot about her.
Comments:  This story is the result of a Keli-tossed plot bunny.  She asked for a story where Rogue spent her whole life with Mystique and Sabretooth until meeting Logan and where Logan tells Jean he loves her.  Ah, but this was no ordinary bunny - the story also had to be relatively foofy and angst-free.  You can see my predicament ;)  She ruthlessly flung this bunny at me right before vacation, and while in Canada, the movie Ten Things I Hate About You was on one night.  Voila, we have a theme and a vehicle for this mutant bunny ;)

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Damn, time to get the hell outta here.  That roar's the Brotherhood's plane, probably Magneto.  Which would be pretty shitty for me.  I have no desire to spend six months getting my fuckin' metal skeleton straightened ever again.  Besides, we got the files we came for. 

"Logan, move it!"

"Comin' right now, one-eye."  Just gotta grab that one last disk and-hey, what's that? It's got eyes-brown eyes, big ones.  And maybe hair.  "Hey-come outta there."  Hidin' underneath a desk-can't be a Brotherhood attacker.  "Come outta there, come on."  It's a girl-young, eighteen, nineteen maybe.  And she looks like shit.  Wait-she's got a white streak in her hair.  There was somethin' 'bout a mutant like that in the pre-mission briefin'.  Aw, shit, I really should pay more attention to those things.  "Come on outta there."  She looks scared shitless, so I don't think she's a hostile.  Wild hair, all matted and a dirty face-or maybe those're bruises?  "Come on out.  I won't hurt ya."

"Logan!"

"Yeah, yeah, keep your pants on!"  There she is-still scared shitless but comin' out.  "Hey-who are you?"  No response, but her eyes got real big.  Well, whoever she is, she can't stay here unless she wants afternoon tea and an ass-kickin' with the Brotherhood.  "Look, we gotta get outta here.  You can come with us.  We're, uh, the good guys and the bad guys are about to get here.  C'mon."  Maybe if I just reach out my hand a little-yeah, there we go, she's comin' closer. 

"Logan!"

"Christ, all right!"  No time for get-to-know-ya.  "Let's go, kid."  Whoa, she definitely didn't like me grabbin' her arm like that.  "Look, we gotta go.  We really gotta go now, so come on."  Somethin's tellin' me-somethin' strong-not to leave her here.  Well, I can always throw her over my shoulder if she don't wanna help me out here. 

"Logan, what the hell-"  Fuckin' Scooter.  I said I was comin', dammit.  "What are you doing?!"  Now why's he gettin' all hyper?  Raisin' his hand to his visor like the girl's some kinda threat.  "Get away from her-that's-that's the Rogue!"

"The Rogue?  Shit, she's just a scared girl."

"She's the most dangerous mutant in the Brotherhood.  Step back.  And you-don't try anything."

"Look, dumbass, she was hidin' under a desk.  She can't be-"

"We've got to go!"  Fuck, Jeannie.  Well, looks like the big bad Brotherhood Rogue is goin' over my shoulder. 

"Oooh!"  She don't like it, but we definitely gotta go right now.  That plane's comin' down. 

"Logan, you can't-"

"Move it!"  All that bitchin' that we gotta go and now dumbass wantsta have a discussion.  "I got her, let's go!"





"Why are you refusing to answer our questions, Rogue?"  Well, she hasn't said anythin' at all-nothin' on the plane, nothin' to me, nothin' at all.  Maybe she can't talk or don't.  She just looks like she's about to cry now.

"I toldya I found her hidin' under a desk, scared as hell.  I'm tellin' ya, you got it wrong, she's not a threat."

"Really?"  I hate Scooter when he gets like this.  All 'I'm the big leader, I know everything, I listen at the pre-mission briefing.'  Yeah, yeah, whatever, asshole.  "Because our best intelligence-five years of it-pegs her as Brotherhood.  Her mother is Mystique and her father is Sabretooth."  She *really* looks like she's gonna cry now.  Well, if somebody said that to me, and I was, you know, a scared little teenage girl, I'd be pretty fuckin' upset too.  If it wasn't true, it's one helluva crappy thing to say and if it is-well, that just sucks.

"Intelligence-more like our best guess.  Our intelligence is half-assed on a good day.  Why don't you ask her somethin' insteada interrogatin' her?"

"She hasn't answered a single question so far-you think you can do any better?"  I can always - *always* - do better than Scooter.  I bet my expression is sayin' that pretty good right about now.  "Fine, you try."

"Fine.  I will.  Uh, hi.  My name's Logan and the dickhead that's been pissy for the last half hour is Scooter.  What's your name?"  Shrug.  Huh.  "Don't you got a name?"  Shakin' her head no and lookin' down.  "Well, that bites.  Sorry." That got a little bit of an almost-smile.  "Do you talk?  I mean, can you talk?"  Noddin' yes.  Well, OK, that's progress.  "Wanna say somethin', uh, anythin', whatever's on your mind?"

"What are you going to do with me?"  Oh God, that's the saddest little whisper I ever heard.  I got this urge to go over and hug her.  Where's that comin' from?

"We're gonna talk to you a little, figure out what's what, and then we'll see.  Maybe you'll wanna stay here.  We got a lotta mutants here that-"

"Logan!  You can't offer a home here to one of the Brotherhood."

"Oh, Christ, use some goddamn common sense, wouldya?  She's no more a Brotherhood agent than I am a ballerina.  Probably just some kid that got mixed up with them."

"I'm not.."

"What?"  I know I heard somethin' come outta her, but she's just lookin' down again now.  "Did you say somethin'?"  Noddin' yes.  "Could you, ah, say it again, and a little louder so Scooter can hear too?"  Noddin' yes and takin' in a deep breath.

"I'm not Sabretooth's daughter."  Oh.  Well, good.

"But you are Mystique's daughter, aren't you?  And you have a name-it's Rogue."  You know, I wanna pound Scooter even more than usual right now.  A lot more than usual.  She's not sayin' nothin' and those tears are comin' out now. 

"Lighten up.  Look, why don't you go find a new pole to shove up your ass or somethin', huh?  Let me talk to her for a while."

"I can't leave you alone with her.  She could attack you.  According to intelligence, her skin-"

"Is lethal even to me-yeah, yeah, I heard you the first dozen or so times you said that.  Go on, hit the road."  Maybe I'll just smile at her a little.  Show her I'm on her side. 

"Fine.  Get yourself killed.  Don't say I didn't try to warn you."

"Yeah."  Whatever.  Don't let the door hit ya on the ass on the way out.  Bye-bye.  "So, uh, I know he's pretty much a tight ass, but, uh, is Rogue your name?"  Confused look.  Hmmm.  Maybe she don't know. 

"It's not my real name.  I don't think I have one."  She's really, really scared.  I can smell the hell outta her even from across the room. 

"Well, I know how ya feel there.  I can't remember what my last name is.  I just kinda made up one.  What'd your name be if you could make one up?"

"Marie."  She's calmin' down a little.  Lookin' at me with those big eyes, a little more curious than scared now.  Heh.  I knew I'd do better than Scooter.

"That's pretty.  Why Marie?"

"I saw a movie once about Marie Curie."

"Who's she?" 

"A scientist.  She discovered radium.  She-she was smart."  You know, I bet this kid would be real cute all cleaned up.  She's got those big brown eyes that just draw ya right in.  Now me, I've always been partial to redheads, not to mention I don't go for young girls, but-but Marie'd be cute. 

"I bet you're pretty smart.  You were smart enough to hide when things got rough."

"I was trying to run away."  Whoa-head hung pretty low. 

"What happened?"  Not sayin' nothin'.  Well, it probably sucks enough for her not to wanna talk about it if she was tryin' to run away from it.  "Or we don't hafta talk about that."

"He's right.  Mystique-she's my mom."

"Oh."  Lotsa tears now.  I hate fuckin' Mystique.  Bitch.  She probably don't have a maternal bone-or spot of goo or whatever she's made out of-in her body.  "Well, you're, uh, old enough to be on your own now, so you don't hafta stay with her if you don't wanna.  You can stay here with us."

"I don't know.."  She's probably thinkin' that she don't wanna live under the same roof as tight-ass.  Well, I thought so too at first.  Hell, I still think so most days.  But it ain't a bad deal, even with that thrown in. 

"You don't hafta decide right now."  But I'm pretty much decided.  She's about as far from bein' a danger to us as it gets.  We could keep her here, let her get her feet on the ground and shit, and I bet she'll do real good.  I could even look out for her a little.  You know, help her settle in.  "Do you have any, uh, questions for me?"  Frantic head shakin' no.  I bet nothin' good came of her askin' questions back where she was.  "It's OK, really.  I won't get mad or nothin'."  Little look like maybe she's gonna try that out.

"What-what are you going to do with me?"  Flinch there, almost like she expects me to smack her or somethin'. 

"Nothin' bad."  Let's get that out right away.  "Nobody's gonna hurt you here."  Oh-oh.  Big frownin'.  She don't believe that, not at all.  "I ain't gonna let no one hurt ya.  Look, I know Scooter's kinda paranoid.  But he'll come around, and so will the Professor.  He's a good guy."  Still not convinced, and there's that big urge to hug her again.  "I'll look out for ya.  I'll make sure you're OK and nobody messes with ya."

"Promise?" 

"Promise."  What just happened there?  When she said that my breathin' stopped and I went and promised, just like that.  Her mutation's supposedta be lethal skin, not promise-indcuin'. 

"Thanks."  Nice smile.  She is pretty cute.





Alarms.  That can't be good. 

<Logan, the Brotherhood is attacking.>

<Here?>  I didn't think they'd have the balls for that.  We usually kick their ass and on our home turf, we're definitely gonna kick their ass good.

<I believe they are after the Rogue.>

<Fuck!>  Poor kid's only been here a week.  And she's been doin' better.  She talks a lot now and everythin'.  Well, she talks to me.

<Sabretooth is headed to her room.  Logan, move to intercept - >

<Already on the way, Chuck.>  'Cause I promised to protect her and I'm itchin' to kick some mangy Sabretooth ass.  I got an idea of what that fuckhead did to her, and this time, he ain't walkin' away. 

Just one more corner to go around and then-fuck!  Door's right off the hinges.  Motherfucker! 

"Noooo!"

"I said shut up!"  Got her by the hair, draggin' her on the floor.  He's got Marie.  He's got Marie. 

"Hey!  Asshole!  Pick on someone your own size."  Claws out.  Good to go.  Come on, let her go.  Let her go and come and tangle with me.

"Stay outta this, runt.  She's mine.  Back off." 

"She ain't yours no more."  And why did I almost say 'she's mine?'  I really gotta look into that once I'm done decapitatin' this jerk. 

"She'll always be mine."  Get-get your hands off her.  Don't grab her like that.  Nobody touches her like that.  Grrrrrr.  "Isn't that right, gi-oof!"  Heh.  Good for her-elbow to the ribs.  Just enough for him to drop her and for me to pounce.

"Rrrrrr!"  Slice and dice time and hey wait-what the hell?  Is that some kinda collar he put on me and-shit!!!!!!!!!!!  Why ain't I healin' from that swipe to the gut?  Somethin's wrong, somethin's really wrong. 

"No!  Stop!  Stop it!" 

"Run, Marie, rununnh"  Shit, I'm hot healin' at all and I can't get this damn collar offa me.  Fuck. 

"Heh.  'Marie?'  Is that the name he gave you, huh?  I toldya, you're nobody, you don't have a name.  You.  Belong.  To.  Me."  Gotta help her.  She's too scared to run and I gotta help her.  Fuck.  Can't-can't quite stand up.  But I can crawl.  I can crawl to her.  I promised to protect her and I'm not lettin' her down. 

"Go away!"  Just a few more feet.  She backed herself up against that far wall and just a few more feet.  "I'll-I'll do it!  Stay away!"

That mangy fucker's got an ugly laugh.  "You ain't gonna do shit.  I've had every single inch of your body and you never did shit.  I know it hurts you as much as me, bitch.  Now stop fuckin' around.  Get up and let's go."

Almost there.  Hang on, Marie, hang on.  "Stay away."   Oh-oh.  She took a glove off.  She means to touch him.  But I think he's right-it'll hurt her a lot too and I can't let that happen.  Just gotta stay conscious and keep enough of my guts in until I can-

"Arrrrghhhh!"  Shit!

"Marie!  Let him go!"  She ain't lettin' him go.  I can see it in her eyes-never seen her look like that before.  She ain't lettin' go, not until he's dead.  Not until he's gone.  Fuck.  "Stop, Marie, stop."  It's almost done, I can tell.  He ain't even shakin' anymore.  She's-she's in bad shape, though.  She's lettin' go now, but she's gonna pass out, I can tell, and -

"Logan!"  Christ, finally. 

"Jeannie-get-help Marie.  Help her.  Help her." 

"Logan, you're-you're not healing." 

"Yeah.  Get this thing offa me."

"Good God!  It's a-"

"Collar that negates my powers, yeah, I know.  Look, help Marie.  Just-just-aaah!"  That fuckin' hurt like hell!  "Stop pokin' my guts!"

"Sorry!  Sorry!  Let me get the collar off.  I think-I think this button here should-ah, yes.  There."

"Great.  Peachy.  Now would you fuckin' help Marie?"  'Cause I only said it, oh, a hundred fuckin' times and she's layin' there unconscious to boot. 

"She's out.  I can't-I can't reach her telepathically.  Did she kill Sabretooth?"

"Yeah.  With her skin."  She's gotta be OK.  She's just gotta.  Come on, Marie, come on, baby.  "Then she passed out.  Sabretooth said somethin' about it hurtin' her to use her skin.  Jeannie, you gotta help her."

"Logan, I don't-her vitals are stable, physically, she's fine.  I don't know how her mutation works.  I don't know what's wrong." 

"Jesus Christ, you gotta try somethin', you can't just let her-"

"Logan, we're needed elsewhere.  The fight's still on." 

"You gotta help her, Jeannie, you gotta-"

"There's nothing I can do for her now.  Logan, we've got to-"  That's the look of her gettin' a message from Chuck.  "Oh.  They're retreating.  The Professor said-he sensed that Mystique-she saw Sabretooth's death and ordered a retreat.  They're afraid of her skin, very much.  They-they-they seem to think she'll wake up." 

"Well, pardon me, Jeannie, but I don't really give a shit.  You gotta get her to the medlab.  You gotta do somethin' to help her, you gotta try."  'Cause she's gotta be OK.  Gotta be.  I can't lose her, not now, not so soon, not like this.

"OK.  OK, Logan."




Fifteen hours.  She's been out fifteen hours.  Jeannie's no fuckin' help and neither is Hank.  Don't know what's wrong with her, don't even know how to begin to try to find out.  Fifteen hours.  She's gotta wake up eventually, right?  Even if it's somethin' wrong with her head like they say, her vitals are OK.  Her body's OK.  That means her head's gotta come around eventually right?

"Hey, Marie, I was thinkin' that when you wake up, maybe you and me'll do somethin' together, you know, take a little vacation or somethin'."  I know Jeannie said there's no guarantee she can hear me if I talk to her, but I kinda think she can.  And I think she'll like gettin' outta here for a while.  It's been hard on her this past week-they all still kinda don't trust her and nobody really talks to her or does stuff with her except me.  Maybe if there's some time for her to just hang out with me, just someone who likes her, you know, she'll have a little bit easier time handlin' what happened.  "I remember you talkin' 'bout Alaska and we could sure go there if you wanna.  I wouldn't mind goin' back across Canada at all.  Been a while since I've been up there."

"Or we could go out to the desert.  You were sayin' you wanted to see the Grand Canyon.  Might be a little hot there-well, 'course it would, it's the desert-but we could go out there if you wanna.  I can teach ya some more stuff on the way, you know, about math or history or whatever.  I could even get ya some of those books you liked-the Civil War ones.  I think your readin's gotten better even in the last week.  You read pretty good now." 

"I wish you'd just wake up, Marie.  I'm-I'm a little worried.  I made ya that promise and everything and, well, I fucked up.  I guess it's a little selfish, but I really, really want you to be OK 'cause I want another shot at keepin' that promise.  If you do wake up, I swear, I'll do a better job from here on out."

I know when she wakes up, she'll probably be pretty upset about havin' to kill Sabretooth.  And that's another reason maybe we should get outta here for a while-Scooter and Jeannie and even fuckin' Chuck are gonna question her on that.  They're gonna ask all kindsa questions about why he came after her and why she killed him insteada just hangin' on long enough to knock him out or somethin'.  She's not gonna want to talk about all that, and she shouldn't hafta.  I mean, hell, Sabretooth was a walkin', talkin' piece of shit that didn't deserve to live.  I say the sooner he's offed, the better.  And it's justice, or at least as close as it gets to justice, for her to be the one to take his life.  He took a lot from her, stuff that she ain't gonna get back easy. 

"Mmmmm.."

"Marie?  Marie?  Come on, kid, wake up.  Come on, darlin', let me see those big brown eyes." 

"Logan?"  Oh, God, she's wakin' up.  Thank God.  She's gonna be OK.  She's gonna be OK. 

"Right here.  Right here, Marie.  I gotcha."  I've been holdin' her hand the whole time, you know, in case she could feel that while she was out, so she'd know I was here, but maybe a little squeeze will make her understand.  "How're you feelin'?"

"My head-it hurts so bad."

"Jeannie!"  Oh, shit, screamin' out like that probably wasn't the smartest thing ever-Marie looks like that hurt her head pretty bad.  "Sorry.  I just, ah, wanna get you some help."

"Sabretooth-is he-is he-"

"He's dead.  Really dead.  I checked.  And I decapitated him just to be sure."  Scooter just about blew a gasket at that, but, hey, he was already dead, Jeannie said so.  I didn't make him any deader.  Just a precaution.  Plus, I hate his fuckin' ass.

"I can't feel him in my head.  He's-he's gone." 

"Ain't that how it usually works?"

"No, no, they usually stay in my head.  I don't-all those years, I never touched him because I didn't want him up there.  That would be worst of all."  Fucker.  Just the way she said that - I oughta go by his grave later and defile it or somethin'.  There's gotta be somethin' you can do to fuck with him even if he is dead.  "But my head just hurts."

"It's gonna be OK, baby, don't you worry.  Jeannie'll be right down and she'll fix you right up."  Gotta touch her hair, just a little.  Don't really know why, but I just gotta.  My Marie

"Logan, are you OK?"

"Don't-don't try to sit up, yet, all right?"  She looks so worried 'bout me, even though she knows I heal.  That's kinda-that kinda tugs at your heart a little, you know?  "I'm just fine.  They got the collar offa me and I'm just fine now.  All better."

"Whew.  I was really scared.  Really, really scared." 

"For me?"  Noddin'.  She was a little talkative right when she woke up, but I can tell she's goin' back to bein' careful what she says and not usin' words if she don't hafta.

"I hated seeing you get hurt."  Sad smile.  That definitely tugs at your heart. 

"Same here.  I promise, Marie, I'm gonna take better care of you from here on out.  I promise that.  I know I didn't do so good this time, but I'll make it up to ya."  I think that's OK with her.  She's just rubbin' at her head with her free hand and holdin' onta my hand pretty tight.  Where the hell is Jeannie, anyhow? 

"I dreamt that you said we'd go to Alaska together."  Heh.  Knew she could hear me.  No guarantee, my ass.

"That wasn't a dream, Marie.  I think-once you check out OK and all-I think that'd be a good idea.  Just get the hell outta here for a while, the both of us."

"Really?"  Stopped with the head rubbin' and she looks just as happy as I've ever seen her.  I like that look on her.  I like it a lot. 

"Yeah, really.  You just sit tight, OK?  I'm gonna go get Jeannie to take a look atcha right now."




"A-a week, Logan.  That's how long you've known her, a week.  You're leaving us, the team, this life, all for her  - after you've known her a *week*."  You know, I'd have thought that of all people, Jeannie would be the one with the least problem with this.  She's always bitchin' and moanin' about the tension between me and her asshole husband 'cause of how much I hit on her when I first got here.  You'd think she wouldn't be this upset about me goin'.  The Professor, Scooter, 'Ro-none of 'em were upset.  A little surprised, yeah, but not mad or nothin'.

"Look, it's a vacation.  It's not like I'm permanently leavin'."

"How long, then?  A week, two?"

"Aw, I dunno.  However long it takes for Marie to get on her feet a little, deal with what happened, and start feelin' OK.  However long that is."

"Well, I guess it will be permanent then, won't it?  Even if her story's true, even if she wasn't a willing participant in Brotherhood activities, it could take her the rest of her life to overcome what's happened to her.  All she's ever known is abuse and that's not something that gets fixed over vacation, Logan."

"Well, whatever, then."  I really ain't gonna discuss this.  One thing I figured out about Jeannie-she liked to hear herself talk.  Don't matter a whole lot what you say.  "I've gotta meet Marie in the garage now.  See ya around."

"That's-that's it?  'See you around?'  Logan, you can't-you have to rethink this, you can't just pick up, change your *entire* life, do-"

"Jeannie, darlin', I love ya, I really do.  But I gotta go.  Look on the bright side-I'll be outta Scooter's hair for a while."  I swear, you'd think I wouldn't hafta point out that particular upside to her.  "See ya."

Marie's probably all packed and good to go.  I know she hasn't got much stuff, just some spare clothes from the mansion hand-me-downs and a few little things she had on her when we found her.  I told her to just pack whatever.  I went to the bank and got out all the money I had saved up.  Bought a car-Jeep Cherokee oughta be good for gettin' us where we wanna go-and a few other things.  We'll see how it goes.  Got about $20,000 left-and more in Canada if I need it.  That oughta do us fine for a while, and oughta cover whatever she needs too. 

"Hey, kid."  She looks pretty nervous.  I don't think it's 'cause she's scared to go or scared of me or anythin' like that.  Just-it's all new, you know?  She told me that they never let her out much and didn't even let her watch TV or listen to the radio or things like that.  Fuckers.  Mystique-she's definitely on my "To Kill" list.  "You ready?"  Noddin'.  "OK, lemme show ya the car."  I hope she likes it.  I really didn't consult her and it's a helluva long drive to Alaska, but I kinda figured I was the one who knew the most about cars anyhow.

"It's nice."  Nervous little smile.  Maybe there's somethin' I can do to put her at ease. 

"Hey, you know, I'm glad we're goin'.  It'll be nice for us to get out for a while, just you and me.  Just a nice, relaxin' trip."  I'll smile to let her know I mean it.  Good-she's smilin' back.  "Let's get a move on."





"Wanna stop?  They got a Tim Horton's."  Noddin' and smilin'.  If I've learned one thing 'bout Marie in the four days we've been drivin' across Canada, it's that the girl likes her maple donuts.  And she especially likes 'em from Tim Horton's.  She'll eat the longjohns, occasionally a chococate covered donut, but she really likes the maple ones.  Actually, I've learned a lot of things about Marie in the last four days. 

One-she likes havin' a cup of coffee first thing in the mornin'.  Usually likes that from Tim Horton's too, a double-double-double sugar, double cream.  Me, I take it black, but she gets some kinda little kick outta havin' it with cream and sugar. It's almost like it's some kinda decadent little indulgence for her, coffee with cream and sugar in it.
I don't think she ever had it like that before.

Two-there's lotsa things she hasn't had before.  Never been in a restaurant before our little trip here, had no idea what the hell a menu was.  Never pumped gas before-I taught her how and she was real curious 'bout car stuff, so I taught her some of that too.  Once we get to Alaska, I said I'd teach her to drive if she wanted to.  Marie's never had a beer before this trip.  Never had hair conditioner until she ran across a little bottle of it at the first motel we stayed at.  When we went shoppin' and I bought her a few clothes and things, I asked if she wanted any makeup or other girlie stuff.  She had no idea what makeup was. None.  I mean, she looks good without it, I wasn't tryin' to hint or nothin', just tryin' to get her what she needs.  She did end up gettin' some Chap Stick but that's it.  Makes me think her life before-well, I don't like to think on that too much 'cause it pisses me off a lot.  Suffice to say, she's gonna get what she needs and see a lot more stuff from here on out. 

Three-Marie-not a big talker.  Mosta the time noddin' yes or no will do her.  Even when she does say stuff, it's in the least number of words possible to get across what she's tryin' to say.  I don't mind that at all and in fact, I kinda like people who aren't chatterboxes.  But I worry a little that she don't talk outta fear or somethin'.  The fact that, just for a few minutes, right when she regained consciousness, she was talkin' some, well, that makes me think that she kinda wantsta talk more but she ain't sure how I'll take it.  I made a mental note to encourage her when she does talk.  I think that's best.

Four-Marie has issues.  She's been through hell, so that's not really a surprise.  But she's got nightmares, bad ones, and most of the time she looks like a puppy that's been kicked around all it's life but still hopes to get petted insteada kicked every time.  At first, I took that a little personal.  I mean, I've never hurt her and it's kinda insulting that she still acts like that's what she expects sometimes, even when she's just with me.  But then I started thinkin'-she's had eighteen years of livin' her life one way, and her whole outlook ain't gonna change overnight, no matter how nice I try to be to her.  I settled on just bein' nice all the time and lettin' her get adjusted at her own pace.  I think that's best, and I can see little signs of progress.  Like yesterday, when she hugged me outta the clear blue sky just as we were leavin' the motel room to get back on the road.  Which brings me to the next thing:

Five-Marie's very touchy about bein' touched.  Ain't hard to figure out why, and I'm careful about that.  But the surprise has been that she does like me to touch her sometimes-like the hug or the time I just put my hand on her leg while we were drivin'.  Did it without thinkin', caught myself, took my hand away, but not a second later, she took my hand and put it back on her leg.  Blushed so red I thought she was gonna explode there for a second, but I heard her heartbeat and breathing even out and I could tell it was like some kinda comfort to her.  So now, I do little touches, and I encourage her when she touches me.  Kinda like the talkin'.  And the truth is, I like touchin' her too. Keepin' a hand on her somewhere-well, it settles me, knowin' she's right with me, right by me.  So that's workin' out well for both of us. 

Six-Marie likes baths.  Not showers, baths.  She likes to soak, and she likes to use lots of towels to dry off.  I think that's just a girl thing, not necessarily a Marie-specific thing, but I think it's kinda cute. 

Seven-She's got a sense of humor.  It's subtle, but it's there.  When we were checkin' in to one of the motels, this lady at the desk is lookin' all around for her glasses, right?  Well, they're on toppa her head, and Marie points to her head, to let the lady know.  Like I said, Marie-not a big talker.  Well, the lady gets it, puts her glasses on, takes care of checkin' us in, and puts 'em back on toppa her head.  But she forgot to write down our room number in her book, so she grabs a pen and says, "Now where'd I put those glasses?"  I look over at Marie, thinkin' she'll do the head-pointin' thing or somethin' to let her know, but instead she just gives a shrug and gets this impish little look on her face.  See?  Subtle. 

Eight-she likes nature.  She's been real into seein' the sights and goin' to parks and stuff.  I don't think she got outside much and she likes bein' outside, just like me.  I told her that there's a lotta parks and neat places to stay out west, and we could explore them a little if she didn't mind takin' the extra time to get to Alaska.  She nodded big at that. 

Nine-Marie likes me.  And I mean, not just like friends or somethin'.  She's got a thing for me.  She don't let it show too much, but I can tell by some of the looks she gives me.  From what I can tell, it confuses her a little and she's not sure how to let me know.  I think there might even be a little nervousness or fear in there-given her past history, I can understand why any kinda romantic anythin' would make her jittery.  But I'm pretty sure she likes me and she's slowly but surely gettin' ready to let me know that.  Which brings me to:

Ten-I really like Marie.  I dunno what it is exactly, but I think it musta been there, at least a little, even from the first second.  It's partly her smell, it's partly this feelin' I got that she's mine, it's partly that the more I get to know her the better I like her, and it's partly that I find myself wantin' to hold her and kiss her and stuff.  I mean, I'm the Wolverine.  I'm a lady killer, and I'm not big on the hearts and flowers aspects of it, ya know?  Most women want a good, hard, animalistic go-round from me, and I have always been more than happy to oblige.  They didn't want talkin' or kissin' or holdin' or anythin' like that and neither did I.  But I got those urges for Marie, and that makes me think it's real, it's somethin' true.  I really like her, maybe even love her.  It don't make sense, but then again, what the hell has in my life so far?  At least this don't make sense in a good way. 

"Logan?" 

"Sorry, kid.  I'm comin'."  Here I am just sittin' in the car, thinkin', in the parking lot of the Tim Horton's.  If that ain't love, I dunno what would be.




"Logan, can I say something to you?"

"Sure.  Whatever's on your mind, darlin'."  I think she's gettin' ready to tell me.  She's gonna frown a little, and her eyebrows are gonna scrunch together, and she'll sigh when she's tryin' to get the words together right, but I think she's gonna say she likes me.  It's been three weeks since we've been on the road, we're campin' out in Denali, it's beautiful, and she's slept in the sleepin' bag with me for the past three nights.  She's gonna scrape her nerve together and tell me, I can feel it.

"It's not an easy thing to say."  That's the sigh.  There go the eyebrows.  Come on, Marie, you can do it.  "It's-it's a big thing, and it's a little-trying to say it is a little-it feels like I'm jumping off of a cliff, you know?"  Good God, she *is* real nervous here.

"It's OK, darlin'.  I'm gonna be there to catch ya."  That helped.  That got a little smile.

"I think I-I-I-"  Big sigh.

"It's OK.  Just let it out."

"I have thoughts about you, like thoughts of maybe one day, if you wanted to, if we could think of a way around my skin, maybe, at some time, if you wanted to too, maybe kissing you."  Oh, my darlin'.  That was just the sweetest thing I've ever heard.  My Marie.

"I'd like that.  I was thinkin' that maybe, one day when you're ready, we could use a hanky or a scarf or somethin' and we could kiss, you know, whenever we both wanted to."

"You've been thinking that?"  She looks scared and relieved and excited and confused all at once.  She looks beautiful like that, you know.

"Yeah.  I don't wanna scare you or nothin', but I like you.  I wantcha to know that I'm not gonna ever - *ever* - do anythin' to hurt ya or do anythin' you don't wanna do too.  And I'm not in a big hurry.  But I'd like to kiss ya, darlin', whenever you're ready."

"Now."  Whoa.  Whoa.  "I'm ready now.  If-if you want."

"C'mere."  This is workin' out good.  OK, a little faster than I thought, but that's good too.  Kissin' Marie, underneath the stars-yeah, that's very good.  "Let's-I got a hanky in my pocket.  It's clean.  You wanna try that?"  Noddin'.  "OK."  Just gonna move in real slow, lay the cloth over her mouth.  Just gonna give her a real soft, real light kiss and we'll see how that goes.  She's not ready to play tongue hockey, and I gotta remember that, no matter how delicious she might taste. 

OK, here we go.  Kissin' Marie.  Mmmvery nice.  And I think she liked it too.  Maybe one more.  One a little longer, but still nice and soft.  Very, very nice. 

"That didn't hurt at all."  That-that's gonna break my heart, that amazed little whisper. 

"Never gonna hurt you, Marie.  Never."

"More.  More, please."  More Marie-kissin' is somethin' I can definitely do.  Love that.  Gettin' addicted to it already.  "Oh." 

"You doin' OK?"  Noddin'.  And smilin', real happy, genuinely happy.  "Whenever you want, Marie, we can do that whenever you want."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that.  Just nice and good.  Just-just however feels good for you, OK?"

"Did you like it a lot too?"  God, it hasta be love, 'cause when she looks up at me with those big eyes and says stuff like that, I can feel it all the way into my bones. 

"I liked it a whole lot, darlin'.  A whole lot."




Well, that went OK. I know they're not glad to hear it, but after a year away, they can't be surprised that we decided not to come back.  I'll miss some of 'em, but livin' up here with Marie-well, it's been the best time of my life so far.  And hers too, I'm pretty sure.

"Are you OK?" 

"Yeah, darlin', just thinkin'."

"If you change your mind-"

"Not gonna.  C'mere."  She's changed so much in just a year.  She's so happy now, so comfortable with me, so *free*.  She comes right over and hugs me, kisses me, touches me, makes love to me.  She smiles when she does it, and I know she feels safe with me, feels content.  I love every single minute of seein' that, and even though she offered to come back to me with the mansion, I know she wouldn't be the same livin' there.  Up here, it's just a little isolated cabin in the mountains, it's just me and her, and she can be who she wantsta be, her best Marie, without havin' to deal with people who think bad on her.  She's just gettin' on her feet now, she needs time.  Maybe one day, she'll be ready to deal with it, but not any day soon.  

And frankly, that's OK, because it's gonna give me time to learn more about Marie. 

"What're you thinking about?"

"Oh, just what I figured out about ya over this past year.  Things like-you got a great laugh.  Really warm and rich and even when you're giggly, it's full and hits all the good notes."

"Mmmm.....I've figured out a lot about you, too, you know."  That's another thing-talkin'.  She does a lot of it now-well, compared to before-but it don't bother me.  In fact, God help me, I think it's cute when she rambles a little.  It's probably 'cause I remember when she was too scared to talk and how much that made me feel for her.  I wanted to just hold her all the time.  Well, that hasn't really changed, to tell ya the truth.  I still kinda do.  "You're beautiful, really beautiful, inside and out."  She almost doesn't blush when she says things remotely related to me naked.  Heh.  "You're a wonderful cook.  You can make yummy stew out of all kinds of mountain critters.  You're an excellent carpenter.  You're charming-you always make me smile and make me feel like I'm good, like I'm pretty."

"You are, darlin'."  I'm gettin' a little excited with her sittin' on my lap like this.  I always let her take the lead, but sometimes I hint a little.

"You're a very, very good poker player, but one day I *will* beat you."  Love it when she teases.  Gettin' me excited for sure.  "You miss watching hockey on TV.  But you kind of like not having a TV.  You're always up before me in the morning, but you're always considerate enough to let me sleep in.  But most of all," Oh, God, the look in her eyes-I haven't seen anything quite like that ever before.  "You're the best lover I could ever ask for.  You make me feel loved, always.  You've been gentle and patient and kind beyond belief, and I don't think I would've ever known what love really was or ever had sex with anyone if it wasn't for you.  I want you to know that you gave me all that and I want you to know it means everything to me.  I just want-I want to give at least a little of that back to you.  I want you to know, deep down, that I really love you with all my heart."

"I know it, darlin', you show me all the time." 

"Let me show you now."  I think she probably noticed I kinda wanna.  But I wanna say one more thing. 

"Everything I know about you, I love.  I think I loved you from the second I saw ya.  I wantcha to know that'll be forever, darlin'."  She's gonna kiss me.  She's bringin' the scarf over.  She's gonna kiss me.  That never fails to get me goin'.  Works every time. 
"Mmmm."

"Wanna head into the bedroom, darlin'?"

"I love you."

"Love you too."  I know a lot about Marie, but that's the biggest thing, the one thing in the world I know for sure. 

 

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