Title: Little
Logan, or, The More Things Change
Author:
Terri
E-mail:
xgrrl26@yahoo.com
Rating: PG
Disclaimer:
I don't own any of them. Poo.
Archive:
WRFA, Dolphin Haven, Peep Hut - anyone else, please ask and I'll happily provide
:)
Feedback:
Please? With a cherry on top? Good, bad, and ugly welcome.
Summary:
Sequel to Prince Logan and the Ballerina, or, Tutus are a Girl's Best Friend.
Logan gets de-aged this time, and Marie has a little more to worry about
than tutus ;)
Comments:
This was inspired by a plot bunny (I want to say it was Mels, but I can't
remember for sure and I'm pretty sure more than one person came up with
a sequel bunny featuring little Logan - please let me know if these bunnies
are yours, and I'll
credit you when the story is posted to the website!), and I needed to do
something *short* for a change ;)
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"You stay
'way from her, bub, got it?" You know, somehow I thought he'd get less
possessive when he de-aged. Sigh. I wonder if I gave him this
much trouble when it happened to me.
"It's OK,
Logan. I was just talking with Hank about how to reverse the effects
of the - um, how to fix what the bad guys did to you." I have to remember
that I'm not dealing with adult-Logan here. I have to try to put things
into kid terms. He only gets more frustrated when he doesn't understand
what's going on.
"She's mine.
Mine!" Oh-oh. There go the claws. I was hoping to avoid
this.
"Oh my stars!"
"Hank, I
think you'd better go. Let me try to talk to Logan a minute and I'll
catch up with you later, OK?" I think Hank's catching on - and he's
high-tailing it out of here, poor guy. Well, I guess Logan just doesn't
like me near anyone else, even in his four-year-old incarnation. Damn
Brotherhood. Mystique - we've really got to think of a way to keep her
out of the mansion. She's the one who stole our computer files and
figured out how to replicate the energy burst that changed us all into toddlers
a while back. Only this time, they all kept their mutations for some
reason, so I've got a claw-spouting mini-Logan to deal with now. "Logan,
can you please put the claws back in?" Whew. There they go.
"I gotta
pwotect you, Mawee." Aw. That's cute. And God knows he's
an adorable kid - wild hair, bright eyes, a cute pout. A pout which
I have seen often in the past two days. "I gotta keep da big people
'way from you. You're my girl. Mine!"
"Not all
the big people are bad, Logan. Hank's our friend and I don't want you
to threaten him with the claws, OK?"
"Hmph."
Did I mention his stubborn streak? I guess I should be thankful that
I didn't get him during his terrible twos. But, oh-oh. He's really
rubbing those knuckles something fierce. I bet he hurt himself letting
the claws out.
"Do your
hands hurt?"
"No."
Uh-huh. Try another one, little guy. But it is kind of touching
that he wants so much to be strong. He's been so hyper about me getting
taken away from him by one of the 'big people' - Hank or Scott, the only ones
besides me who weren't toddler-ized.
"You know,
it's OK to tell me if it hurts. Remember before, how I told you that
you used to be big? Before, when you were big, you once told me that
the claws hurt. It's OK to tell me, honey."
"Not 'honey,'
Logan." Right. Right. He doesn't like endearments or baby
names. He's just Logan. Badass four-year-old Logan.
"Sorry.
Let me see your hands, OK? Just let me see them a second." He's
putting out one hand, which I guess is a good sign. I've always been
gloved since the attack, and I've warned Logan to keep clear of my skin at
all times, but I've caught him reaching out for me once or twice, coming a
little too close to the bare skin on my face for comfort. I wonder if
he really gets it.
"I heal."
"I know.
But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt you." His hands did heal, though,
just perfectly.
"I'm not
hurt. I'm stwong."
"I know you
are." I don't think that's an argument that I can win. He's determined
not to show an iota of weakness, probably because he feels this big need
to protect me but is so hyper that he won't be able to because he's so little
now. "Come on, do you want to have some lunch? I was going to
make us hamburgers out on the grill. Just you and me, OK?"
"Yeah!
Meat!" That's Logan, my little carnivore.
"So, how's
your little charge?" Oh - Scott. You know, he's enjoying this
whole Logan-being- little thing just a tad too much.
"Fine.
We're just finishing up lunch." And Logan's already giving him the
evil eye. "We were going to go out in the woods to play. Want
me to bring Jean along?" Logan doesn't seem to mind me being around
the other kids. I guess he feels like he could kick their asses if he
had to, and he's probably right. Even though they kept their powers
too, they're mostly too scared of them to use them. Poor Jean had to
just block out the voices in her head altogether. Storm tried flying
and ran right into the big tree in the front lawn. Remy accidentally
charged his favorite toy and exploded it. I really hope Hank can come
up with something soon. I just know the Brotherhood's got to be planning
some kind of attack while they're all like this, all little. What would've
been the point of Mystique pulling that stunt if they aren't?
"I think
she's got her heart set on staying in and playing with her Barbie Dreamhouse."
"You got
her a Barbie Dreamhouse?"
"Hey!
Logan got you a tutu." Touche. "And you got him a little leather
jacket. And a cigar!"
"Well, he
really wanted one and, anyway, I don't let him smoke it in the house."
"Rogue -
"
AWOOOOOGAAAAA
Shit.
Mansion alarm. Speak of the Brotherhood and -
"Get the
children inside. Meet me in the lower levels." He's already headed
off, but, God, how am I going to get Logan to understand -
"Mawee!
You stick wif me!" Oh-oh.
"Listen to
me Logan, you've got to get upstairs. Go to our room and stay there.
I'll be right up, I promise."
"No!
I hafta pwotect you!"
"I know you
want to, Logan, but I'm big. I can take care of myself. You need
to go upstairs, now."
"No!"
BOOOM
I'm guessing
that was the mansion front door getting taken out. Damn. "Logan,
you listen to me. You go upstairs right now. You can't stay
with me. I can protect myself. You have to go and hide, and you
have to go now."
"We've come
for Rogue." Damn. Damn. Too late, that's Magneto's voice,
and close. We have to get out of here. I'll just pick up Logan
and -
"Ah, tsk,
tsk. Not so fast, my dear. Just where do you think that you're
going?" You know, I really hate him. Why can't he just leave me
alone? "I have plans for you, and if you come quietly, I won't harm
the boy, or any of the other, ah, *children*." Crap. I can't
let him hurt Logan, but I don't trust him to keep his word, not at all, and
God knows Logan won't just run and leave me, even if I tell him to.
Crap. "Well, my dear, what will it be?"
"GRRRRR!"
"Logan, no!"
He sprung right out of my arms and right for Magneto. God, please,
don't let him get hurt!
"Ahhhh!
Get off me, you - you - cretin!" Have to help Logan. Have to
help Logan. He's getting a few good swipes in with the claws, but Magneto's
going to knock him out with something metal from the kitchen in a second.
I know him. Have to help Logan. But how? "You. Shall.
Regret. This." Holy crap, the refrigerator's moving - he's going
to hit Logan with it!
"GRRRRAAHHHH!"
Shit, Sabretooth! And he's leaping right for me. Where the hell
is Scott?
"Ooof!"
I forgot how big and heavy and scary this jerk is.
"Mawee!"
Logan's off Magneto and heading for me, but that will give Magneto the perfect
chance to -
"No, Logan,
no!"
"Grrrr-
umph!" I can't believe he actually did it, he crushed him against the
floor with the refrigerator and he's only a four year old kid! Logan!
Logan!
"Look here,
girlie. We got plans for ya. Come nice and quiet like and I won't
gut ya." You smirking fucking bastard. You're going to get yours.
"Yeah?
Well, I've got plans for you too." They involve my skin sucking the
life out of you. His face. I can work my glove off and grab his
face. "Take that!"
"AAAHHHH!"
"Release
him! Release him!" Oh, don't worry, I'm getting to you too,
asshole. Nobody hurts my de-aged toddler boyfriend and gets away with
it. I just have to take this jerk out first. "You shall pay for
- urph!" Gotcha. Forget I have two hands, one all nice and available
to throttle you with? Lucky for you, this one's still gloved.
"Try anything,
Erik, and I'll snap your neck." With Sabretooth's strength flowing through
me, I could do it.
"Do not be
foolish." Funny how he can try for intimidating even when I've got
my hands wrapped around his throat. "Let go now, before I - "
"Before
you what? Hurt someone I love? Sorry, that ship has sailed."
No more talking. It's concussion time for you. I have to help
Logan. Erik's head, meet the hard tile floor; tile floor, Erik's head.
Well, that made a satisfying crack of the skull. Now I just have to
move the fridge off of Logan, which should be no problem with Sabretooth's
strength. Please, let Logan be OK. "Logan?"
Oh God, he's
not moving. He's not moving and his neck is bent and a funny angle.
Oh, God, please, no. Not like this.
"Rogue?
Are you in here?" Scott, finally.
"Get Hank
- Logan's hurt!" Why did they have to de-age Jean, dammit? Hank's
more science guy than medical guy and Logan needs a medical guy now.
"Hurry!"
"Mmmm."
"Logan?"
I could've sworn he made a sound. "Logan, don't move. Help's
- help's on the way, don't move, you're hurt." Please God, please, just
let him be OK.
"Mawee?"
Oh, thank God. He's back. Twenty-four minutes. Twenty-four
of the longest, most agonizing minutes of my life. Thank God he's healed.
"Right here,
sugar."
"Not 'sugar',
Logan. Ooomph."
"Don't try
to move yet, OK? Just lay back in the bed." I knew he wouldn't
like waking up in the medlab, but I was too afraid to move him, even after
Hank swore he was sure that Logan was healing just fine. As soon as
he reset Logan's neck, things went a lot faster. His poor little body
must've been trying so hard to heal that injury, but the neck was just stuck
at a bad angle from the break. God, next time, no concussion.
Next time Magneto fucking dies. He could've killed Logan, really killed
him. That son of a bitch.
"Where's
da big people?"
"They're
gone, they're in jail now. They're not going to hurt you anymore."
I would've thought that would make him feel better, more secure, but he's
got just the biggest frown imaginable now. "What's wrong?"
"I didn't
pwotect you. Da big people gotcha." OK, that's it. That's
all the heartbreak I can take in one day. Just look at him - totally
upset because of that, because he thinks he didn't protect me well enough.
"I messed up. I'm bad." And it looks like he just wants to cry
- oh, God, definitely more heartbreak than I can take in one day.
"It's OK.
It's OK. I'm just fine, Logan, and you did really well. You're
- you're not bad, please don't think that. You were very brave and you
protected me from Magneto really well. You - you jumped on him before
he could get me and distracted him. You did well, Logan, you did just
fine with protecting me. I'm OK."
"Hmph."
"Oh, sugar,
I - "
"Go 'way.
Go 'way, Mawee, I did bad and I don't wanna - "
"Logan,
shhh." Now I'm crying. He's just so amazingly sweet, you know?
Even as a toddler, he's always thinking about me, always wanting to take
care of me. "You didn't do badly, not at all, OK? Let's - let's
go up to our room, all right? Let's get you out of this medlab.
Let's just head up to our room, and you can keep an eye on me up there, OK?
I'd really like - I'd really like you to hang out with me for a while, OK?
I'm still a little shaken up by everything - by everything that's happened.
I'd feel a lot better if we could just head upstairs, all right?" He
doesn't quite know whether to believe me or not, but I'm betting that his
protective instincts will kick in, that they won't let him pass up a chance
to watch over me in a confined space like that, to have me all to himself.
"Please?"
Oh!
He's hugging me for dear life and I think that's a yes. I think that's
definitely a yes. "OK, Mawee."
OK, I think
I'm a little more on top of it now. Logan's been bathed and we've both
stopped tearing up at the drop of a hat and we're ready for bed. Bedtime-
my favorite time of the day. OK, it's much, much different with little
Logan than it is with big Logan, but they both sleep all curled up next to
me and that's universally a good thing. Especially today. I could've
really lost him today, and it'll be good to have him put his little head down
over my heart and fall asleep in my arms.
"Ready to
hop in?"
"Uh-uh.
You sleep. I'm gonna stay 'wake and watch out for big people."
I don't even have the heart to argue the point with him right now. He's
been trying so hard to make up for not protecting me back there, that I just
kind of think that whatever he needs to do to get back to feeling some control
over the situation is OK. He'll fall asleep eventually anyway, and
if it makes him happy, so what?
"OK.
But come on in bed, I need to cuddle." For as much of a badass as
he tries to be, he still gets a big smile when I ask him to cuddle.
Actually, big Logan does too. "There. That's good." Feels
good to hold him. His little body breathing in and out, warm and next
to mine - I know he's still alive, still with me. I can know it and
really feel it when he's close like this.
"Mawee?"
"Mmm-hmm?"
"I jus' gotta
get bigger, dat's all. I jus' gotta get bigger and den I can pwotect
you wight." Did I say I wasn't tearing up at the drop of a hat anymore?
I take that back. "I pwotected you good when I was big. Didn't
I?"
"Very good.
Better than anyone, ever. You were my knight in shining armor.
And you're doing really good at that now, Logan. Don't ever think otherwise,
OK, sugar?"
"Not 'sugar,'
Logan."
"Right, I
forgot."
"Mawee?"
"Mmm-hmm?"
"'Member
when you said I told you stuff before, when I was big?"
"Uh-huh."
I wonder why he's so tense all of a sudden. Maybe I'll just rub his
back a little. That usually works on big Logan.
"It did hurt.
It did hurt when my claws came out and it did hurt when the 'fwigewatooo
dropped on me. It did hurt." Did I say tearing up? It's
more like big, slobbering crying jags now. "It hurted a lot."
"Oh, Logan,
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry you got hurt, baby." I'm going to hold
him to me as tight as I can and just press my cheek to his hair. It's
as close as I can get without hurting him with my skin, and I - I couldn't
stand to lose him, I just couldn't, and he came so close. I don't think
I've ever been so scared in my life. "But I'm going to take care of
you. I'm going to try my best to make the hurt all better. That's
what we do for each other, you know. You take care of me and I take
care of you."
"Dat's wight.
I'm gonna stay up and watch for big people and if any come, I'm gonna say
- GRRR! and make 'em get 'way from you, and I don't care if I get hurted.
I'm gonna pwotect you all better dis time." For all the tough talk,
the words came out quiet and subdued, and he's still clinging to me for dear
life, with his head buried in my chest. He was afraid today, and hurt,
and I can't ever let that happen again. Not to little Logan and not
to big Logan.
"I'm going
to protect you a lot better from now on too, Logan. I promise."
"So you're
sure this will work?"
"Yes."
"You're positive?"
"As positive
as it is possible to be in this situation, yes."
"I wanted
just an unequivocal 'yes' there, Hank."
"Ah, sorry."
I know he's doing his best, and I trust him, I do. It's just that I'm
still shaky from Logan's close call a couple days ago, and Hank had better
be very, very, very, *extremely* sure that this won't hurt him and that
it will work. "But I am very certain. It is essentially the
same process used last time, with a few minor modifications to account for
the variances Mystique made."
"OK."
I guess that's as good as it gets. I'll just try to be brave.
Logan will smell it if I'm afraid or anything. "Let me talk to him."
He's actually been waiting fairly patiently for me outside the observation
room. I think the fact that he could see me through the window made
it a little easier. Lord knows his eyes never left me - he couldn't
care less about the other kids or what they're playing with.
"You done?"
Maybe 'waiting patiently' was a tad of an overstatement. "I wanna play
now."
"I'm done
for now. But I need you to play over there with the other kids while
I go back in the observation room for a minute."
"Hmph."
Arms crossed, hair pointing up, mouth pointing down - yep, that's a Logan
pout in full bloom.
"Logan,
Hank is going to shoot a beam of light at you all to make you all big again.
You need to be right over there for it to work, honey."
"Not 'honey,'
Logan."
"Right.
Sorry. But you need to play over there so you can get big again, OK?"
I can see it play out in his expression - the desire to be big again and therefore
more able to protect me versus the fear of having me out of proximity and
with one of the 'big people' - Hank - again. I've been trying to convince
him that Hank's OK, but
"You gonna
be wight dere?"
"Right there.
And you'll be able to see me through the window until Hank begins the energy
ray. I'll stay in the window so you can see me the whole time."
"Hmph."
Maybe it's time to try something a little more convincing.
"You know
what? I really love you a lot, Logan. You're my guy, and I'm your
girl. I know you're a little worried about this, but I want you to
trust me. I've trusted you a lot and it's always worked out OK.
I'm asking you to trust me now. What do you think?"
"OK."
Whew. "But hurry up. I wanna play wif you."
"I'll be
as fast as I can. Give me a hug, though, OK?" If something does
go wrong. "I love you, sugar."
"Not 'sugar,'
Logan."
I'd better
lighten up, tease him a little. I don't want him to have second thoughts
or be scared. "But I like calling you sugar."
"Hmph.
OK, but just you."
"Deal.
Be brave." One more kiss on top of his head. There we go.
Better head back now before I get any more emotional. "You ready, Hank?"
"Yes."
Let this work let this work let this work let this work let this - "It will
work, Rogue, trust me."
Breathe,
Rogue, breathe. "Right."
"Here we
go." Whoa - I don't remember the light being that bright last time.
And it's taking forever - last time it was just a few seconds. "There.
Finished."
I can't wait
to see - I've got to go out there. They all look bigger and - yes!
Big Logan! I've got my big Logan back! "Oh, sugar, I'm so glad
to see you!"
"Ooof!"
OK, I probably shouldn't have launched myself at him like that, but I've
missed him so much. I've got my big Logan back!
"You're up
early."
"I like watching
you sleep." And I want to bask in every available moment of big Logan
goodness that I can get. Last night was plenty good, but still - I
like watching him relaxed and all snuggled into bed with me.
"Yeah?
I ain't too much to look at, darlin'."
"Sure you
are. You're my Logan."
"Missed
the big me, huh? Sorry 'bout all the stuff I put you through there.
You know I, uh, I didn't mean to cause you all that trouble."
"You weren't
any trouble, sugar. I just wish I could've taken care of you as well
as you took care of me. You were really amazing and you got me a tutu
and I - well, I got you almost killed."
"Hey, don't
cry." I can't help it. It's true. I did an awful job.
"Marie, you took real good care of me, darlin', you always do."
"I got your
neck broken by a refrigerator-wielding Magneto. I didn't - I didn't
know how to convince you to go upstairs, to run and hide, and you could've
died because of that. God, if we ever have kids, Logan, please, don't
let me anywhere near them."
"Don't you
say things like that. Don't." Whoa. I was half-kidding
with that last part but he looks almost pissed that I said that. "Marie,
lemme tell ya somethin'. There was nothin' you coulda said or done that
woulda made me leave you, no way. That was on me, not you."
"Logan, you
were four. I was the adult. Of course it was on me."
"Some things
carried over from be bein' a grown-up; I wasn't a normal four-year-old.
You know it as well as I do - cigars, leather - no little kid wantsta smoke
a cigar, it'd make 'em sick. Marie, lovin' you, protectin' you - that
carried over and it's not your fault that it did. Don't say stuff like
you better not go near our kids 'cause - 'cause I don't wanna have you bein'
scared to be a mom to our kids. You'd be a great mom. Don't let
this bullshit that Magneto pulled make you think otherwise."
"OK."
When he gets all passionate and animated like this, I really can't say anything
but 'OK.'
"Good.
And lemme tell ya somethin' else - you took damn good care of little me.
I can't remember if I ever got any love as a kid, but I kinda think the
answer to that one's a big 'no.' You gave me that. You gave
me a safe, loved feelin' every second I was with ya, and not just, you know,
physically safe. You made me feel like my heart and soul were safe
with you." I can't even get out an 'OK' for that. I can't get
out any words. That was just beautiful, just amazing. "Aw, darlin',
I didn't mean to make you cry more. Shit, I didn't mean for that to
be upsettin'. It's just that - well, that I don't think anyone woulda
loved the little bastard that I was, not anyone but you. Don't worry
yourself over the me not gettin' love as a kid parts of what I said. "
"I can't
imagine anyone who wouldn't love you, sugar, no matter how big or little
you were." I've really got to try to pull it together. He's just
said all kinds of wonderful, tender things to me and here I am bawling like
a baby. We're supposed to be celebrating, happy. I've got to at
least stop the heaving sobs if not the tears.
"I'm glad
you think that way, darlin'. C'mere. Lemme hold ya. C'mon,
don't cry." It's nice to have him hold me, have him rock me in his arms
again. "You did real good with me, Marie. Real good. No
worries, OK?"
"OK."
That was a little better. Almost not sniffly. "I love you."
"I love you
too. Now c'mon, let's talk 'bout somethin' else. Somethin' happier,
OK?"
"OK."
It's time for me to say some nice things back. It's time for me to
take care of him a little bit now. "You know what I liked best about
little you?"
"Hmmm?"
"You still
looked good in a leather jacket." That got a laugh. Good.
"I think we should keep it, you know, just in case we ever do have kids one
day. We can give it to our son, and we can give my tutu to our daughter.
I - I don't think I'm ready now, but one day, if - if you promise you'll help
me, I think you might be right, I think I could be a good mom."
"Deal."
And with those kind of kisses the things that lead to babies aren't far
behind. But I meant it. Not now, I'm definitely not ready now
- but I do want to try being a mom one day. I want to try that with
Logan. After all, we've both got experience with little versions of
ourselves now. We'll do OK. "Let's stay in bed today, darlin'.
I got plans for ya."
"Mmmm.
OK, honey."
"Not 'honey',
Logan."
"Right, sugar."
"Tease."
"You like
it."
"Sure do."
Enough talking for now. Time to bask in the goodness of big Logan.
It's definitely good to have him back.
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