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Pick Your
Poison - Chapter Eleven
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Title: Pick
Your Poison
Author:
Terri
E-mail:
xgrrl26@yahoo.com
Rating:
PG-13, swearing
Disclaimer:
I don't own any of them. Poo.
Archive:
WRFA, Mutual Admiration, Dolphin Haven, Peep Hut - all others please ask,
and ye shall receive ;)
Feedback:
Please! Pretty please? Good, bad, and ugly welcome........
Summary:
Sequel to Chapter ten. Jean gets busted and has to make amends.
Comments:
Sorry for the delay - the usual holiday nuttiness was keeping me busy, and
a nasty head cold pitched in to make sure I stayed away from the computer
for a while. With the help of my good friends Benadryl and NyQuil,
I'll be back on schedule soon ;)
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Scott didn't
quite believe it at first. The way it happened - him waking in the middle
of the night, sensing Jean's nightmare at the fringes of his consciousness - made it seem all the more surreal. But he'd been fully awake for a few moments when the worst of it hit. Jean was dreaming of the night they'd brought Rogue in, the night she'd been attacked. Sometimes, when the dreams were particularly disturbing, she projected quite strongly. Now was one of those times. Scott saw
the entire thing through Jean's eyes. He felt her fear of Rogue's skin,
followed her reasoning as she plotted a course of treatment, and, with some
horror, he observed as she loaded two syringes, one with a huge dose of mutatol.
In the dream, Jean froze right there, unable to stop herself from repeating
the mistake just as it happened in reality. She simply stared at the
syringe after injecting Rogue. Scott felt her panic and shock at her
mistake, and felt it begin to snowball as her subconscious held her in that
moment. He reached over, gently shaking her. "Jean - Jean, wake
up."
"Mmmm......nooooo......."
"Jean, wake
up!" She sat bolt upright, panting. "Jean, you were dreaming."
Scott tried to keep his voice level. "You were dreaming about the night
Rogue was attacked." He caught the flash of panic that crossed her
features before she could suppress it. He reached out, putting a comforting
hand on her shoulder. "You were projecting. Jean, I saw what
happened. I know about the mutatol injection."
"I don't
know what you're talking about." Jean shrugged herself from Scott's
grasp and briskly paced into the bathroom. Scott heard the water run,
then splash. He followed her, watched her wash her face for a few moments,
then filled the doorway with his frame, effectively cornering her in the
bathroom.
"It was
a mistake, Jean. Just a mistake. Is this what you've been so
anxious over all this time? Is this why you get upset whenever the
subject of Rogue comes up?"
"I told
you I - "
"Stop it,"
Scott said, in a tone that Jean had never heard him use before. "You
were projecting. I felt it, I know it's true. Why didn't you
just tell me, Jean?"
"I don't
make mistakes, Scott, I can't afford to. What do you think - what would
happen if I had told everyone, hmm? They'd all be skittish about me
treating them. They'd all be nervous every time I had to give an injection.
I didn't say anything because there was nothing to be done about it - it was
all over the second that plunger went down. I ran myself ragged taking
care of her after that, and that was all that could be done. It won't
help anything, it won't change anything, if you go around telling everyone.
There's no reason this can't stay between you and I." She took a step
closer to him, laying a hand on his chest. "Don't you understand?
It was for the best. I had to keep it a secret, so that everyone who
needs medical treatment, everyone who needs my help, would still be able
to come to me for help with confidence. I couldn't have them having
second thoughts all the time. Don't you understand?"
"No," Scott
managed with some difficulty. "We would've still trusted you, we're
- we're all adults. We understand that mistakes happen, Jean.
But I don't understand trying to cover it up. I don't understand it,
especially after we found Rogue. What if - what if her doctor needs
to know, what if it can still help her to - "
"We have
no proof that that man *is* even a doctor, and you yourself said she was
recovering well now. There's no point in telling her now. It
would - it would only alienate Logan further from us, and Rogue too.
Is that what you want?"
Scott took
a step back from her. "Don't you see what you're doing, Jean?
You're rationalizing. You're making excuses, you - don't you see that
we have to say something, we have to tell Rogue?"
"No, we
don't. We -"
"Jean," Scott
said softly. "You know I'm right. You do. We'll - we'll
find a way to explain to them. We'll talk to the Professor first and
we'll find a way to tell them. But we have to do it, Jean, you know
we do. You can't keep carrying this around. Look at you.
You're stressed, you're having nightmares about it. You have to let
it out." Jean said nothing, but she cast her gaze downward and took
a step toward him. Scott took that as an encouragement. "Come
on. I'll go with you in the morning to tell the Professor. I'll
be with you the whole time. Jean, he'll understand. He loves
you and he'll understand. Come on." He held out a hand to her,
and she took it.
"I - I
don't know what I was thinking, I - " She cut herself off with a sob, and
the dam broke. Her tears came flooding out, and she fell into Scott's
shoulder.
"It's going
to be OK, honey. It's going to be OK."
The morning
discussion with the Professor went about as well as Scott had hoped.
He was very understanding about the mistake Jean had made, but he came down
on her a little harder than Scott thought he would about Jean hiding her mistake
all this time. It wasn't that the Professor didn't sympathize - he
said he did, and Scott could tell that was true. However, he also said
he was angry and disappointed in Jean, more disappointed than he ever had
been in her, and Scott knew that hurt Jean deeply. He didn't relieve
Jean of her medical duties, though, and that was what she had feared most.
He simply asked her to explain what had happened to her teammates, and to
Rogue's friends. He also informed Jean that he expected her to let
Logan and Rogue know. Jean simply nodded, and grabbed onto Scott's
hand tightly.
Telling her
teammates was the easiest part. Her tearful confession to Storm was
met with understanding and empathy, as was typical of the weather goddess.
It was much more difficult for Jean to tell Jubilee and Kitty. She
hated the thought of abasing herself in their eyes, especially Jubilee's.
She was well aware of the girl's animosity toward her and this confession
felt an awful lot like subjugating herself before an enemy, something she
had much too much pride to tolerate without bitter resentment. She
did it, though, holding her head high and not giving an inch the entire time.
The girl called her a quack, a liar, and accused her of trying to hurt Rogue
on purpose. Jean didn't respond once it reached that point; she simply
declared the conversation over and left.
Jean wasn't
sure how she should go about telling Logan and Rogue. She thought e-mail
might be best - she could send a note to McCoy, and he would surely convey
the information to them. Scott urged her to tell one of them directly,
as did the Professor. Reluctantly, she agreed to call the phone number
Kitty and Jubilee had supplied after their visit. Asking Scott to sit
with her while she scraped up the nerve to do it, she finally dialed the
numbers she was given.
"Hello?"
For a moment, she didn't quiet recognize the voice at the other end.
Letting it ring in her ears for a moment told her it was Logan. She
cursed her luck - she'd hoped for McCoy or one of the 'kids' that she knew
lived there.
"Hello,
Logan, it's Jean."
"What the
hell do you want?" Jean sighed and Scott patted her leg. She'd
expected less than a warm greeting from Logan but was still a little taken
aback by the sharp animosity evident in his tone. Some part of her
still remembered and expected the flirting, smirking Logan she'd known when
he first came to the mansion.
"I - I have
some information, information about our treatment of Rogue, that the Professor
has asked me to share with you." So far, so good, Jean thought.
"Yeah?
What is it?"
"Well, let
me first say that I just want to explain the context in which these events
occurred, to give you a better perspective of what I was - "
"Do you
got somethin' to say or not? Spit it out."
"If you're
going to have that attitude, Logan, maybe you don't need to know," Jean snapped.
Scott cleared his throat and gave her a pointed look. That raised,
instead of calmed, Jean's ire. She didn't like being treated like a
petulant child being made to take her medicine.
"Look, tell
me or don't. It ain't like I'd believe much that came outta Westchester
anyhow. And lemme tell ya somethin' - I'm gettin' this number changed
as soon as I get off the phone with ya. I don't appreciate you fuckin'
callin' here."
"Fine then,
Logan, fine. Forget I called." Jean's hand slammed the receiver
toward its cradle, but Scott grabbed it from her before she could hang up.
He put it to his ear and took a deep breath. "Logan, it's Scott.
What we have to tell you is important. Please just listen for a moment."
Jean rose and stalked away.
"You got
ten seconds."
"Jean accidentally
gave Rogue a large dose of mutatol when she first got to the medlab.
A very large dose. It could've - it could've had a bad effect on her,
we don't know really what the consequences were, but it could account for
some of the problems she had. We thought you should know, in case it
- it has any bearing on whatever treatment you're giving her now. We
thought you should know."
There was
silence on the other end of the line for a few long moments. "Why're
you tellin' me this now? Huh? Why wait until now to say somethin'
if it happened when they first brought her in?" It was Scott's turn
to be silent for a while. "Damn you," Logan said after Scott didn't
answer. "Damn you, Summers, you knew all this time and you let her
suffer and - "
"We just
found out. We just found out. Jean - Jean made a mistake in the
dosage and she - we just found out." Logan said nothing in response
to that, but Scott thought he could hear the man stewing and just about boiling
over on the other end. "We found out last night and we're calling now.
I'm sorry. I hope, I hope it helps."
"You keep
Jeannie the hell away from us." It came out in a vicious snarl, and
was followed by the sound of Logan loudly hanging up the phone. Scott
sighed, then hung up himself.
"Hank!
Hank!" Logan stalked through the house, furious. "Hank!"
A furry
blue head poked into the hallway. "Yes?"
Logan let
out an impatient sigh and stalked over to him. "That was Summers on
the phone."
"More problems
with the x-men?" Hank was immediately on guard at the mention of Scott's
name.
Logan grunted
in the affirmative. "Asshole called to tell me that they gave Marie
a big dose of that drug when they first brought her in. Said they just
found out about it and we should know in case it matters to what you're doin'
with her now."
Hank frowned
at that. "How - how is it possible that they just found out?
Were they reviewing the records or - "
"I get the
feelin' Jeannie just fessed up to it." Hank's eyes widened at that,
but, seeing Logan's own fiery expression, he decided to put aside his own
anger for the time being.
"It would
have been very helpful to know at the outset of treatment. It may have
- having that knowledge, that piece of the puzzle, may have shortened Marie's
recovery period considerably. But now - now I believe that we are on
the correct path. It seems that the drug has cleared her system completely.
I - I do not know that the information is practically useful now."
"I could
fuckin' kill 'em."
"I know,"
Hank said softly. "But I think the most productive thing to do now may
be to inform Marie. It may be of some comfort to her to know that she
- that there was a reason that she was so far gone, so quickly. It
may make her feel better and in any case, it is the truth. She deserves
to know, and I am certain she will take the news best from you."
"She in
the kitchen still?"
Hank nodded.
"Making some very delectable-smelling banana bread."
"I'll talk
to her."
Logan lingered
in the kitchen doorway before going in. Marie was filling three loaf
pans with batter and Logan was enjoying watching her. It seemed mundane,
but Logan remembered a time when the idea of Marie being left alone in the
kitchen was unthinkable. That stirred his anger anew, and a growl escaped
his lips, a growl that Marie heard. She turned to him smiling, but
her smile quickly faded when she saw his expression.
He tried
to soften. "Hey, darlin'. How's the bread comin'?"
"What's
wrong?" Logan had to smile a little at that. She knew him very
well.
"Got some
news. Got a call from Scooter." Marie put the batter bowl down
and headed for Logan, stopping just a few inches from him. "It ain't
good news, and I'm not sure exactly how to tell ya."
Marie's eyebrows
knit together and she reached out for him - carefully, her hands were bare
from baking. "You always find a good way," she encouraged.
"OK."
He reached out for her waist, and pulled her body to his. "Scooter
called to tell us somethin' 'bout what happened when they first brought you
in. " Marie's eyes darkened, and Logan suddenly wasn't so sure he did know
how to tell her this. "Jeannie, she gave ya a big dose of mutatol,
she says by accident. Might be why you, uh, kinda got so wild right
off. Might be why you couldn't assimilate Sabretooth in your head like
you did with other people before. I dunno. Hank - Hank says it's
all outta your system now, and everythin's OK, but - but you should know."
Marie leaned
forward and rested her head on Logan's shoulder. "How long?"
It came out in a whisper.
"How long
what?" Logan copied her hushed tone, and began rocking her in his arms
a little.
"How long
have you known?"
"Since this
mornin', when Scooter called. Jeannie - I get the impression the shit
just hit the fan on it now. She musta tried to sweep it under the carpet
or somethin'."
"She knew
all this time? Why - why - " Marie huffed in frustration. Sometimes
her words couldn't keep up with her thoughts.
"I dunno,
I dunno why she'd keep it quiet if it really was an accident. I dunno."
"No, why
did she - she kept giving me the drug after that, didn't she? Why?"
Logan didn't
really have an answer for that, and it suddenly dawned on him that Marie
was making a lot of sense. Why *would* Jean continue to give Marie a
drug she'd already overdosed her on, a drug Marie'd already displayed a bad
reaction to? "Dunno. Fucked up, that's for sure."
Marie pulled
back from him a little. "Don't - don't let them get me." She
never asked for things like that, even though Logan often promised them.
It caught his attention, and raised his level of alarm and anger. He
stifled those emotions, though, and took Marie's face in his hands, shielded
from her deadly skin by her hair.
"I'm never
gonna let 'em get near ya ever again. I swear it to you, Marie.
I swear it." That seemed to satisfy her, to comfort her. Logan
pulled her close to him again, needing to reinforce his words with a tight
embrace. Marie returned it, and began to relax in his arms a little.
Soooo.............time
to pick your poison:
1) Logan
calls Westchester and give Jean a piece of his mind and to see what else
he can find out
2) Hank
gets curious about what else might have happened to Rogue and decides to
do a little digging
3) Jubes
and Kitty hatch a plan to find out more about what happened after hearing
Jean's confession.
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