Bobby came over to Scott's cabin after catching a glimpse of him heading back with Christopher from Hank's cabin. Scott had looked distinctly upset, and Bobby was worried. He knew Scott had been different ever since the news about Jean, but he'd never seen him quite this upset. When he opened the door to see him sitting numbly on the couch, ignoring Christopher as he played at his feet, Bobby knew he had to try to do something, say something to help his friend or to at least find out what was wrong. "Hey." Scott's head turned to him slowly, as though he hadn't heard Bobby come in. "Uh, I just came over to say hi. And to see if - if you were OK." Bobby let the sentence hang there as Scott stared at him. "Um, hello? Scott? Anyone home in there?" Scott still didn't say anything, so Bobby went to sit beside him on the couch. "Come on, Scotty, you're scaring me. You're the rock, you're our fearless leader, snap out of it." That roused Scott, but Bobby almost immediately wished it hadn't. Scott's jaw was tightly clenched and anger seemed to suddenly be radiating from every pore. "I can't just snap out of it, Bobby. And I'm no one's leader any more." Scott rose and stalked to the kitchen, plopping a bottle of what looked like vodka or gin down in front of him at the table. "Watch Christopher for a while, all right? I have things to do." "Like drinking yourself silly?" Bobby moved cautiously closer to him, glancing back to check on the oblivious Christopher. "Yeah." Bobby frowned at that, and seated himself opposite Scott. "What's wrong?" he asked simply. "I don't know what happened to me, Bobby. I got - I lost - I don't know what happened to me." Bobby hadn't expected that answer. Scott's routine response was 'everything's fine' or 'don't worry about it.' He'd never actually talked to Bobby about his problems, ever. The fact that he was doing so now unsettled Bobby deeply. "You should've seen Rogue up there. She was terrified. Terrified of me, of what I might do to her. You should've seen her Bobby. No one's ever looked at me like that." "Why - why was she afraid of you?" He knew that the girl didn't like Scott, because of the Jean thing, but he couldn't imagine why Rogue would actively fear Scott. "Because I - I haven't given her any assurances that she shouldn't be. Because I've been going right along, fighting with Logan, just like always. Because I got so caught up in my own pain that I didn't think about anyone else. I was in such a hurry to hurt Logan somehow, to hurt someone like I was hurting inside. God, what happened?" Scott slumped forward, burying his head in both hands. Bobby absurdly wished Hank would somehow magically know what was going on and appear to handle this. He was the one Scott usually told his problems to, if there ever were any. And, at least as far as Bobby knew, whatever problems there were, Scott handled with ease. All this time - during the war, during Scott's captivity, his horrible time in Maine, coming here and losing a fight for supremacy to Logan - in all that time, Scott had never wavered, never shown any signs of stress at all. Then again, Bobby thought to himself, maybe that's the problem. Maybe the news about Jean was the straw that broke the fearless leader's back. Hank had said Scott took the news hard, and that he and Bobby would have to support Scott, but Bobby never really saw any change in his friend until now. Now, he realized just how right Hank had been. "Scott, listen - you're - you're OK. You're going to be fine. I'm sure if Rogue got scared that she'll understand once you explain it to her, I'm sure she will. You couldn't hurt a fly, everyone knows that." Bobby reached over to grasp Scott's hand as the other man just sat there shaking his head at Bobby's words. "If you're - if you're hurting, just let it out. Me and Hank - we're here for you. You've been through a lot, anyone would go a little nuts from it. Just let it out, Scott." "I can't. I can't." "Yes, you can," Bobby encouraged. "You can trust me." By now, Christopher had caught on to the fact that his father was no longer watching him play and he'd wandered over to tug at Scott's pant leg. Bobby picked him up instead, and he fussed, but eventually settled in Bobby's lap. "Look, whatever it is, you can talk to me about it. You've always been there for me, every time I've needed you." "I wonder if this is how it was for Jean. I wonder if she just - just got so caught up in one thing, one train of thought that it never occurred to her that she was doing something really wrong." Scott's words unsettled Bobby, but he didn't want to interrupt now that Scott was finally saying something. "I wonder if she just woke up one day and was a totally different person. It didn't seem like she was. She seemed the same after I got out, when we were in Maine. She seemed OK. But she wasn't, she wasn't, and how could I have *missed* that, Bobby?" "I don't know," he whispered. "It's not fair. It's too much. She was the only thing that kept me going and now - now I can't even love her anymore, I can't even respect her anymore. I can't tell our son his mother was a good person because she wasn't." "Scott - " "But in my heart, I still love her. She's all that's kept me going, Bobby. I kept hanging on to hope through the war because of her, and through everything after because I had her memory. Because she loved me once and I loved her, and that was a good, beautiful thing. Now.." Scott trailed off, taking a long pull straight from the liquor bottle. "You still have all the memories of the good times, the good things she did." "No, I don't!" Christopher flinched at his father's sudden angry tone and again when Scott's fist hit the table. "I don't have *anything* left! It's all his fault, all Logan's fault! If he'd never have left Jean wouldn't have had to do what she did and I'd still have her! I'd still have her! He took her away from me after all," Scott finished with a chilling bitterness. Bobby didn't know what to say to that. "And Rogue - he just had to find out, he just couldn't let it go. He wanted to screw some underage kid, and so he kept on prodding and poking until he found out what Jean did. She just couldn't have found some other place, stayed away from here, could she have?" That hit Bobby the wrong way. He wasn't overly fond of Rogue, not after that terrible night that Gary was killed, but the implication that Scott's current distress was somehow really all her fault flew in the face of Bobby's own strong sense of fairness, one, ironically enough, he'd learned from Scott. "You know what? You really are messed up. Do you even hear what you're saying? How is it Logan's fault? For finding out the truth? How is it Rogue's fault? For coming here because she needed a place to stay? Listen to yourself, Scott, you're not making sense. You're trying to blame everyone but Jean. I loved her too, but the truth is that she did what she did. That's it. It's there, and I wish I could take it back too, I wish I never knew, but I do and getting mad as hell at Logan or anybody else isn't going to change it." "No. No, it's not." Scott seemed to try to compose himself a little. "Just forget I said it, OK?" Bobby heaved a sigh and shifted a now-very-fidgety Christopher in his lap. "No, I'm not going to forget it. It's understandable to feel that way, perfectly understandable. But it sounds like all that pain and all that anger is changing you. That's what's happening to you. And I don't want you to change into some mean jerk, OK? Forget for a second about Logan and Jean and everything that's happened. Look at what's in front of you. You've got a son who needs you - you, the Scott I know, the man who's generous and compassionate and fair. You can't let your emotions drown that good guy inside. I'm not even going to try to tell you that I know how hard it is - I don't. But I do know that if you don't find a way to deal with all these feelings, they'll take you over and then they'll be in charge, not you. You won't do things because they're the right thing or because you want to - you'll do them because it hurts Logan or because they help drown the pain. You're too strong for that, Scott. You're way too strong for that." "I don't feel very strong right now." Bobby really wished he could see Scott's eyes now - the rest of him was saying he was exhausted, lost, and spent, but maybe his eyes would've held a little hope, a little light. "Then you lean on us, me and Hank. We've leaned on you plenty of times. It's your turn." "I don't want to be this way. I don't want to hate her and I don't want to be angry all the time. I never meant to - to - I went about this all wrong." "Well, then we'll fix it," Bobby said resolutely. "Look, let me - I'll put Christopher to bed. You have another drink. I'll be back out and we'll sit and talk some more." And I'll call Hank, pronto, Bobby added silently. "We'll work it all out, OK?" "Yeah, OK." Scott immediately followed Bobby's instructions as to the drink, and Bobby took a reluctant Christopher back to his room. He prayed for some divine guidance or inspiration now. He was moving in uncharted territory - Scott was the one that had always helped him with his problems, not vice versa, and they'd certainly never faced one this serious before. As he tucked Christopher in, Bobby thought back on Scott's words about him having to become a leader soon with a grim new realization. Scott had been right. Bobby would have to step up, and not soon, now. Maybe not to take over all or even most of Scott's duties, but it was crystal clear that he no longer had the luxury of turning to Scott to solve all the problems anymore. "Better?" Logan completed his slow, languorous massage with a second pass at Rogue's shoulders. He thought it had worked to calm her some. "Mmm-hmmm." "You wanna do me now?" The truth was, he was still fairly exhausted. He'd only had time to have a short talk with Rogue after Scott's abrupt departure before sleep had taken him. The anger and the movement had played equal parts in wearing him out. After that, he'd woken to find Rogue in the bath, and had fallen asleep again before she emerged. Now, it had been almost a day since the incident, and Logan thought that in some ways that was better - now, he had more energy to tend to her and he thought that their long talk and longer massage had made some progress. "Sure." Logan had known she was very dependent on him, both physically, for sustenance, shelter, and all the necessities of life, and emotionally, for affection. He hadn't realized that she had staked her entire concept of safety on him too. She saw him as the one thing standing between her and all kinds of savage behavior that she saw herself as helpless to prevent. Although Logan didn't share her feelings - he knew that Scott would not be likely to harm Rogue in any way - he understood them. And he even had some thoughts on how to ameliorate them, should anything similar happen in the future. It was, after all, an uncertain world, and while he would protect her to his last breath, the best insurance of her safety would be building skills with which she could defend herself. She had two sets of formidable powers now; all she needed was some training and some confidence to make the most of them. Logan could give her that, but first he had to calm her, give her some of the stability back that she'd lost. "How does your back feel?" "Tingly. Still red?" His back was healing the slowest - Hank had told Marie that was partly because the skin was thicker there. Hank still thought he was healing well, though, and ahead of schedule. "Uh-huh. Want me to, uh, lick it a little?" "Yeah, that'd be real good, darlin'." He knew Marie was a little ashamed of the animal side of doing this - that had to be what it was; she'd told him it wasn't the taste or sensation or intimacy of it. Logan regretted foisting that on her along with his powers, but the healing had saved her life. If the healing had to come as a package deal with the animal nature, Logan still considered it a pretty good deal. "Mmmm." He tried to vocalize his satisfaction and comfort when she ministered to him this way, trying to reassure her he didn't think there was anything weird or wrong about it. The truth was that he thoroughly enjoyed it, perhaps a little too much. His body had always been very responsive to her touch and just because he didn't have the stamina to carry through on those responses at the moment didn't mean his body had the good sense to stop having them. "It does look a little better," Marie offered, after she'd finished. "Logan - could you - could you turn over?" He did as she asked, curious at her change in scent. Uncomfortable and maybe a little embarrassed had shifted to nervous and more than a little frightened. Her moods had been quite uneven lately, though. Maybe it was nothing more than a random surge of emotion. "I want to try something. I - I was thinking about some things while you were out and I wanted to try something different. I'm not too sure how I'll do, but I want to try." "Try what, darlin'?" She gave him a wide, shaky smile. "I want to try, um, you know, me using my mouth on you." She suddenly flushed red all over, much redder than Logan's skin was. His body answered in the affirmative by way of a burgeoning erection, but the less self-centered parts of him gave another response. "You said no, honey. You said it scared you and you didn't wanna." "I know. I know I said that. But I - I want to try now." "Hey." Logan whispered the word gently as he sat up to embrace her. "You don't hafta. You know that. You're safe here. You're always safe with me. You don't hafta do anythin' you don't wanna. That's the deal, right? If you say no, it's no, and that's fine. It's fine with me, baby." Marie clung to him tightly, burying her face in his shoulder. "I know. But I want to try. I can't be - I can't just not do things because I'm scared. I know you'd like it if I did it, and I would too. I just - there was some choking before and it was really unpleasant, so I was scared. But I don't think it will be bad with you and I want to try now." Every time she said something like that, something so wide open, so honest, he felt like kissing her silly. The trust she must have in him to do that never ceased to amaze and move him. "OK. If you're sure you wanna try, we can. I won't - I'll just stay still, how about that? We can go slow." She broke from him and nodded, and he took that as his cue to lie back down. She approached him incrementally, letting soft hands trail down his stomach and hip bones before reaching their target. Logan tried to keep his expression soft, reassuring as she began kissing along the path her hands had taken. Finally, she reached the fuzzy patches of his re-growing pubic hair, took a deep breath, and planted one lone kiss on the tip of his penis. Logan couldn't suppress a groan at that. After a glance back up at him, she gently took the tip in her mouth, beginning to suck and swirl her tongue. She tried to push all the unwelcome memories back, and just focus on being here with Logan. She reminded herself that she could stop any time, that he wouldn't hurt her, and she steeled herself to take him in a little more deeply. That wrung a hiss of pleasure out of him; she could tell he wanted this badly. Logan murmured soft words of encouragement and love as she leisurely explored him with her lips and tongue. Marie flinched noticeably when she felt his hand in her hair, but he didn't push her or grip her head; it was a caress, a tender one. Resuming her efforts, she soon had him writhing and panting beneath her and, finally, he called out for her to release him. Almost as soon as her mouth left him, he exploded, narrowly missing her face. She gave him a few final caresses, then rubbed his stomach to help him ride out the sensation. His eyes were heavy, already closing, and she knew he'd sleep again soon. Gazing at him with rapt affection, she took a moment to just look at her lover. Objectively speaking, he looked God-awful - patchy hair growing in all over his body and head, reddened skin - but he looked wonderful to Marie. He was back, he was healing, he'd driven Scott off, and she was safe once again. Her heart filled with love for him, and she slid up along his side to rest her warm skin against his healing body. "When I wake up, I'm gonna return the favor, darlin'." Logan gathered her close to him, wishing he could pleasure her now. He loved how she looked during sex. She looked like his. "C'mon. Lay with me a while. You need some sleep too." Apparently in agreement, she snuggled to him. "It's always gonna be like that, you know," he whispered as they both began to drop off, "it's always gonna be safe for you to try somethin' if you wanna. Always, baby." Marie let out a contented sigh, and let a sound sleep, the first one in days, take her. Hank sat down at his kitchen table, finally finished with making breakfast. He'd invited everyone over - Scott, Christopher, and Bobby - for Sunday breakfast as a way to introduce his new soon-to-be-wife and daughter. The somewhat-ulterior purpose of keeping a close eye on Scott and trying to ease the burden of the daily grind of providing for Christopher was also a strong motive. Hank remembered the night before last - and Scott's frightening state of mind - very well. He hoped that he and Bobby had been able to provide Scott some comfort, and he did seem better, if still emotionally wrung-out. Bobby had stepped in to take over some details of running the camp and now that Hank had some assistance in the medical end of things, he also took on a few other responsibilities. They hoped that Scott would keep talking to them, keep letting them help him and that eventually, things would get sorted out. Sighing, Hank realized that that all wouldn't happen over Sunday breakfast, and tried to keep it light. "How are the eggs?" "Good, Dada!" Jules, ever the supportive son, chimed in eagerly. They were powdered eggs, of course, but Hank had hopes for some small scale chicken-raising this spring and summer. That was another thing on his growing list of to-dos. "They're very good," Holly offered. Hank had broached, very carefully, the subject of who would be performing the marriage and adoption ceremonies to solidify his new family arrangement. Scott, reluctantly, suggested that it be Logan, as a way to build some bridges with him and in hopes that it would ease his anger toward Scott in the long run. Hank greatly feared that Logan would exile his friend and his young son, and Scott seemed to think that might be a real possibility as well. However, as much as they'd fought over the years, when things were tough, Logan and Scott had each stood up for the other. Well, they had until now. Scott's actions were likely to be seen as a betrayal, Hank thought, and the fact that Rogue had reacted so badly would not sit well with Logan either. If there was one thing Logan valued more than his independence, it was Rogue; Scott had threatened both and that didn't bode well. On the other hand, Logan had received Hank's request for a Sunday afternoon ceremony well and seemed affable over the radio. Maybe he'd had time to cool off by now. "Thanks for having us," Scott managed. Christopher smiled up at his father before adding, "Fankooo." That brought a smile to Scott's lips, one both Hank and Bobby were glad to see. They'd both hammered home the point that Christopher needed Scott, that his son was entirely dependent on him and that it was incumbent upon Scott, regardless of his own issues, to try to do his best by his son. Scott hadn't needed much convincing - his paternal instincts were strong - but the reminder that his every act impacted his son in one way or another had been useful. Scott gave Christopher a fatherly pat on the head, and both Summers men resumed eating their breakfast. "So, today's the big day," Bobby threw in. "Wedding day. Hey, um, did we need to get you presents? 'Cause I didn't really have time to get one. Or - or to do a bachelor party. Hank, man, you need a bachelor party!" "Oh no," Hank replied. "I'm quite content to have a bachelor breakfast as it were." He chanced a glance at Holly, who had one hand on Jane's stomach; the child was never far from her, and the bouncy baby chair they'd appropriated from the storehouse gave Jane a spot of her own at the table. Hank was glad to see them both looking content and happy. He needed to also consult with Logan on building on to the cabin - he didn't think there was any prior claim to the trees and other materials he'd be using, but it couldn't hurt to check. He knew that staying in Logan's good graces himself was also important now. "Well, are we at least giving you a reception after the wedding?" Bobby was certainly doing his part at keeping things light. "You know, with a big cake and lots of bad music? Come on, it'll be fun." "How about a hand at planning the addition to the cabin? I daresay that would be much more productive than listening to poorly played music and indulging in cake that my midsection certainly does not require." "Sure," Scott said easily. "I'd be happy to help." Hank gave a genuine smile at that. That was a very good sign, he thought, a very good sign. "Me too," Bobby added. "Yeah, you're right. Building something with your fellow manly buds - that beats cake." Scott gave a small chuckle at that, and Bobby and Hank exchanged pleased smiles. Maybe things were finally looking up, Hank thought. It was really about time. "So, uh, there. You're married, and the kid's all adopted. Have a good life." Logan's awkward benediction signaled the end of the dual ceremony, and nearly all the participants sighed in relief. All of them except for Jane, that is - Hank's new daughter signaled her happiness at the occasion with a loud burp. Marie shared a giggle with Jules at that. "Hey, Hank," Logan said in a much more relaxed tone, "you got a minute?" Hank nodded. "I shall catch up with you in a moment," he said to his son and the new members of his family, gesturing toward the door. It was a warm spring day - they should be all right outside for a bit. Hank noticed that Marie too was waving her goodbyes and heading for the kitchen while Logan hailed Hank over to his bed. He'd performed the ceremony from there, still more comfortable in repose than upright. "Is there something you wish to discuss?" "Yeah. I wanted to thank you for what you said to Marie, for sayin' that you wouldn't let Scooter hurt her. It meant a lot to her and it means a lot to me too." Hank knew that was probably the extent of the conversation that Logan wished to have on the matter, but now might be an opportune time to put in a good word or two for Scott. "I did not believe that she was in serious danger from him. He is - Scott has been under a great deal of stress lately and he has not been himself." "No, he hasn't," Logan agreed. "He's been twice the asshole he usually is." Hank sighed. Well, he hadn't expected Logan to forgive and forget. "I believe he knows that. He - he regrets any pain or unhappiness he has caused Rogue very deeply. Logan, I simply think that the accumulated stress of all that has happened is finally reaching him. He is under incredible strain. He acted badly, and uncharacteristically, yes, but I believe that he is still the man we knew, at bottom." "You go right on believin' that, then," Logan said evenly. "But I don't want him around Rogue anymore. If he does one thing to upset her, I swear it Hank, he's gonna leave me no choice but to boot his ass outta here. I don't wanna do that 'cause I know he's got a young kid, and out there is no place for anybody, let alone a young kid. But I won't have him threatenin' Rogue, whether he means to or not. I just ain't gonna stand for it." "I think he will understand that. I am sure he will endeavor to treat Rogue very well in the future." Hank glanced over at her, finding her openly listening in on the conversation from across the small cabin. She had a steady, hard look in her eye. She wasn't about to forgive and forget either. "I shall tell him to stay clear." "Do that. And, Hank - if he wantsta play big man on campus around here, he'd better find someone to help him. I don't wanna see his sorry ass at my door for a long time to come. You're gonna hafta get someone to help out with the new people, at least. He can send a note or call on the radio for whatever the hell else he needsta run by me. I know the only thing probably keepin' him goin' is that kid and these people, but I ain't gonna butt heads with him any more. It's over. He does what I tell him to, he stays clear of Rogue, and him and his son can stay here and he can play at bein' the big Indian chief if he wants. He fucks up, I kick his ass and then I kick him out. Make sure he gets that." Then again, Hank thought, maybe this is Logan's version of 'forgive and forget,' or at least as close as he could come. It was actually a more generous attitude than Hank would've expected. "Yes, I will." There wasn't really anything else much to say, and Logan seemed inclined to leave the subject behind as well. "Thank you for performing the ceremonies." "No problem. Nice wife and kid ya got there." "Thank you." Hank hadn't disclosed the exact circumstances of his arrangement with Holly; he felt an unexpected warmth at the compliment. He thanked both Logan and Rogue again for their hospitality before saying his goodbyes. Holly returned from the wedding to her new home, crossed the threshold with Jane in her arms, and helped to usher Jules inside. Jane was by now sleeping, so she was immediately delivered to her crib. Hank took a moment to bask in the calm of the afternoon while Holly lay her down. Bobby and Scott would be back after dinner this evening, but for now, he had some time to simply enjoy the company of his new family members. Holly had seemed happy, or at least content, all day; Hank hoped things were going all right emotionally with her. He chuckled a bit upon reflecting how different his current wife was from his former one - Keli had been an outgoing, emotional woman who had worn her heart on her sleeve. His chuckle turned to a bittersweet smile as he replayed memories of her in his head. She'd given him Jules, and a few, too-short but so very precious years of love, acceptance, and happiness. He missed her terribly to this day, but he knew her wish for him was to be happy and to enjoy caring for Jules. He thought he was doing reasonably well, everything considered, at both. He was sure she'd have approved of his offer to marry Holly. Keli was generous more than anything else, and she'd never have begrudged a helping hand to anyone. Hank hoped Holly knew that's what really had motivated his offer, compassion and generosity. He thought she did. "Hey," she greeted, drawing him out of his reverie. "Hello," he answered politely. "I trust Jane is sleeping well?" "Yes." Holly's eyes strayed to where Jules was playing quietly on the floor. "You know, I was impressed with how you explained all this to Jules." Hank showed some surprise at that. He'd merely explained the situation to the child, telling him that he would be marrying Holly and that she and Jane would be living with them from now on. He'd said that Holly was not his mother (Hank couldn't quite bear the idea of Jules calling anyone but Keli his adorable 'mama') but that Jules should listen to what she said. Jane would be raised as his sister, and even though neither Holly or Jane were blue and furry like they were, they were really no different. Jules seemed to take it all in, and had only a few questions, mostly about where everyone would be sleeping. After being told he would need to share a bed and room with his father for a while, he was fine. Living with 'Dada' seemed like fun to him. "I think I'll learn a lot from you about parenting." "That is very nice of you to say," Hank replied courteously. "I am certain that we will make a good team." Holly nodded at that. "Thanks again for - for taking us in." "It is my pleasure." "I doubt it's a pleasure," Holly returned, almost immediately catching herself. "No offense - I just - I meant that now you have to support two more people, Jane and me, and I know it's a hard life here. I know it'll be hard to get the addition built and we'll need more food and more things. I know providing all that can't be easy with your injury. You're going to have it harder with us than you did without us and I guess I'm just trying to say I really appreciate that and I'll try to help you as much as I can. I think you're right, we're a team now, and we'll both help each other out, but - but I know your taking us on will be a burden." "No," Hark argued gently, "It is truly my pleasure to come to your assistance. It is a privilege, I have learned, to be in a position to help others. I have often been in a position to require assistance, and I understand how much a timely offer of help can mean. It is especially my pleasure to help someone like you, someone who has helped so many others." Holly took her hand in his briefly, patted it, then released it. "Thank you." The simple words carried a wealth of emotion and sincerity. "You are most welcome," Hank returned with equal conviction. We're off to a good start, Hank thought, and things may well get better from here. Scott gently woke Christopher from his nap. He knew that if he let his son sleep much longer, getting him to bed for the night would prove difficult. He was grateful for today's long nap, though. It had given him a chance to think things through and to try to steady himself a little more. Hank and Bobby had been carrying him for the past few days, they'd been carrying him a lot. And somewhere deep down, Scott knew they were right - he had to get in control of his emotions and focus on Christopher. He was what was important now. "Wake up, sleepyhead." Finally, Christopher responded to his father's gentle shaking. "There you are. Time to wake up. It'll be dinner time soon." "Dada," Christopher said with a wide smile, reaching up for him with both hands. "Wot foo dinooo?" "Um, let's see what we have. I think we have some carrots, maybe some cereal, and juice. Let's see what else we have, OK?" "Kay." Christopher clung to his father, throwing both arms around his neck as they traveled to the kitchen. "Dada?" "Yes?" "Wuvoo." Scott froze, heart tight with Christopher's innocent, casual declaration of love. The child began to notice something was amiss after a few moments. "Dada?" "I love you too, Christopher. Very much," Scott choked out, trying to smile with the words. "Good," Christopher pronounced. "Dinooo?" "Yes, let's get some dinner." Scott continued on his journey to the kitchen, hoping that he could find a way to give this child what he needed, hoping he could find a way to put all the pain and hurt of the past few months and years behind him. He would, he told himself, he had to. For Christopher's sake, and for his own. Marie lay beneath Logan, panting and sweaty. It was the first time he'd felt like he had enough energy, enough stamina to be on top. She liked that position best - she had always liked being surrounded by Logan, and in that position, she felt like he was covering her, protecting her from anything that could possibly hurt her. "Oh, darlin'......." She liked it when he collapsed on top of her right after and she liked it when he was panting and sweaty too. It meant she'd pleased him as much as he always pleased her. "I love you." They hadn't said the words much, but they'd popped out of Marie more and more often since Logan had been hurt. It usually happened in bed, usually during or after sex, and Logan always said it back. "Love you too." He rolled off of her, drawing her with him. "God, that was good." Marie clung to him, trembling a little. That wasn't unusual after sex; she was still affected deeply by it, and she felt just as vulnerable now as she had the first time Logan had penetrated her. There was something about that, about him being inside her body, that was deeper, more profound than anything else they did together. The fact that he'd been the only one to be inside her without protection - they both could sense the days on which she was ovulating to help them avoid pregnancy - made it very special, but it also made it all the more intimate. It wasn't that those emotions scared her; they just overwhelmed her most of the time. Logan seemed to understand - he held her, kissed her, talked to her until the trembling stopped each and every time, and never took it the wrong way or made her feel bad about being a little shaky. "You're so warm, you know that? Your body feels so warm and so good. I love bein' close to ya. I missed doin' it this way too, you know? It's my favorite way too." "I missed it a lot. I'm so glad you're feeling better." "Mmmmm. Me too. You know, once I'm back to a hundred percent, I'm gonna show you a coupla things. This summer, you and me can spend some time together and I'll teach ya a little 'bout fightin'." "Fighting?" Marie turned in his arms to look up at him. "Yeah. I'm gonna always take care of you, always, Marie, but I think you'll feel better if ya know how to take care of yourself too. It's not a bad idea." Her eyes clouded over, and a frown tugged at the corner of her lips. "I know I didn't handle this whole thing very well, I - " "It ain't about that," Logan interrupted gently. "You handled things plenty well. You got me in time, you saved my life. You hadta deal with Scott actin' like a dickhead that whole time, but you still took care of me. I know you were scared, really scared, but you pulled through it. Marie, I'm not worried 'bout anythin' that happened outta that. You did good." "I don't know," she whispered, "I kind of freaked out. If it had been you, if the situation was reversed, you would've been calm. You would've known exactly what to do." "Darlin', I woulda freaked out plenty and then killed whatever didn't get outta my way fast enough. I woulda probably run around like a chicken with my head cut off, goin' nuts waitin' for you to get better. Gettin' upset over what happened, that's natural, that's nothin' to feel bad 'bout. Freakin' out - well, that's understandable. What's amazin' is how you kept it together, how you took such good care of me when you were so scared for yourself, for the both of us. You did good, Marie." A quick but firm kiss underlined his words. "I just wanna give you the feelin' that you can do somethin' if somethin' like this ever does go down again." Marie shivered at that, but Logan's caresses quickly soothed her. "Not that anythin' is gonna happen. But you got powers, strong ones, and you can learn how to fight with 'em. I can teach you that. And if you're ever feelin' like maybe someone might hurt ya, you'll know that you can defend yourself until I can kick their ass for ya." "OK." Her assent was unsteady, but she trusted Logan. "OK." That was good enough for now. He could tell she wasn't yet comfortable with the idea that she might have to fight for herself. That was OK. He had time to get her used to the concept. "What do you wanna do tonight?" "Besides this?" she asked, dead serious. Seeing his smile, she blushed. "I mean - whatever you feel like, whatever you want." "How 'bout gettin' married?" Logan asked, in an off-hand tone. "What?" "You know, married. That thing I've been doin' for all those other damn people for weeks. I can marry us right here, right now. I've got the power." She began smiling, and Logan knew what her answer was. "Come on, let's do it." "Can we do it a little different than you have been?" She wiggled against him, scooting up to be nose- to-nose with him. "Sure. We can have any kinda weddin' you like." "Good, because I want to say some things before you pronounce us married." That was usually the extent of the ceremony - Logan asked each participant if they wanted to do this, and then pronounced them man and wife. A small certificate that he signed documenting the union was the only other formal part of the ceremony. He was touched, but not quite surprised, that Marie wanted to add more to it. "I want you to know that I love you very much. I want you to know that I love you more than anything. I don't ever want to be without you, and not just because you make me feel safe. I really *like* being with you. I feel happy and - and I-I just feel like *me* when I'm with you. I feel so loved when I'm with you. I'm going to try to make you feel like that too." Logan kissed her gently when she'd finished with the words. "All I have to say, darlin', is that I love you. It's always gonna be that way, and it means that you always come first with me. You can count on that." "I do." Marie favored him with a gentle kiss in return. They lay there, just gazing at one another, for several long moments. "So, are we married now?" "Yep." "Good. Hey, Logan?" She could tell he was getting tired. He still had a lot of healing to do. But she wanted to tell him one last thing. "Yeah?" "I like being married to you." "So far so good, huh? Gonna get even better from here on out, darlin', I promise." Each let themselves drift off, content to be in the other's warm embrace. Marie's last thoughts before sleep came for her was things would get better, that they would be fine as long as she had Logan with her. |